Off-Topic Forum for the discussion of anything that doesn't fit into one of the other forums.

Epic Craigslist add

Old 10-12-2011, 12:00 PM
  #1  
THE STIG
Thread Starter
 
Switchblade's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NAZARETH, PA
Posts: 8,317
Epic Craigslist add

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/pm...619410616.html

This isn't your normal skyline. This motherfcker is the skyline God would drive if he wasn't busy doing God sh*t like making tsunamis and crap. Its set up to go fast, and go fast sideways. Who doesn't like to get sideway?! Terrorists, thats who. Are you a terrorist? No? Then you need this car.

Handling? This car handles like a junior executive CEO. Go around corners like the devil himself is chasing you, and not give a fck.

Whats that? You like drifting? Well I've got some great god [email protected] news for you. This car was a drift project of mine, and the last owner was planning on making it a drift machine too. Interior is for pussies so we got rid of it. Manly as fck. It literally oozes testosterone. So much so that its puddling up in the back.

Seats? this ******cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your dick after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.

Stereos and AC are for hippies. Fortunately this car has neither. Oh look at me, I like listen to Simon and Garfunkel and think about puppies. F*ck that. The only noises you're gunna be hearing is the ultra manly engine noises coming from this sweet turbocharged, intercooled, 24 valve inline 6. Sh*ts getting real, real f*cking fast.

This car has got a bright orange ebrake handle (b*tches love orange) with a drift button for those super ultra megahellatastic bar room brawler ebrake lockers. F*ck. Yes.

Now, I'll be honest. The wheels are a little lackluster, although everyones gunna be so focused on your super gangster drifting that nobody is going to give a f*ck about your sh*tty stock 16s. Don't worry, I've got you fcking covered. Its like we're in Vietnam and you just got ambushed by Charlie. Don't worry, friend, I've got your fcking back and I blow charlie to kingdom fcking come. For an extra $450 I can throw in some added p*ssy magnets for wheels, just don't come crawling back to me complaining that you're getting TOO much vajayjay. Bright fcking green 18s. Greens not your thing? Super legit silver 18s. Done like dinner.

This car has got 1.5 metric f*ck tons of awesome parts. Bride, Greddy, Brembo, the list doesn't f*cking END. It just keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny on speed.

You like going fast? Ever tried to outrun 24 police cars and 3 helicopters? You need this car. It will go so fcking fast that you may very well go back in time. It happened to me once. Just once, but it was fcking rad. Its like someone took a rocket and opened its mouth and poured steroids down its throat and and threatened to kill its family if it wasn't the fastest motherfcker you've ever driven.

I get it. You're busy, I'm busy, lets not waste time. If you're interested send me a message and I'll get back to you ASAP. You send me a message, I send you one right back. Thats how this works.

  • Location: Maple Ridge
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Switchblade is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 12:12 PM
  #2  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 145
I was laughing all the way ! LOL
crossracing70 is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 12:46 PM
  #3  
Senior Member
 
Gardimontana_S2K's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Vail, AZ
Posts: 806
Hilarious!!!
And all that for $5k?!?!?! I'M IN!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHA
Gardimontana_S2K is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 12:52 PM
  #4  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 3,754
LOL! That was great!
RMurphy is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 01:17 PM
  #5  
Bug Zapper
 
Marioshi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Sacramento, CA
Posts: 3,109
Reminds me of a TheBestPageInTheUniverse or Real Ultimate Power. Good reads.
Marioshi is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 05:45 PM
  #6  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,103
Put that in your pipe and smoke it! Too funny.

Last edited by Silverstone_Ryan; 10-12-2011 at 05:56 PM.
Silverstone_Ryan is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 10:45 PM
  #7  
Senior Member
 
L8Apex's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: IL
Posts: 853
This guy must be outrageous by the time you get to the third beer in a girlie-bar.
L8Apex is offline  
Old 10-12-2011, 11:45 PM
  #8  
Senior Member
 
Xiaoschi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Mass
Posts: 300
i REALLY like the car. EVERYTHING WAS ok untill i saw this part.

Seats? this ******cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your dick after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.


I just lost it
Xiaoschi is offline  
Old 10-13-2011, 05:31 AM
  #9  
THE STIG
Thread Starter
 
Switchblade's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NAZARETH, PA
Posts: 8,317
sh*ts getting serious.
Switchblade is offline  
Old 10-13-2011, 07:43 AM
  #10  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,103
Originally Posted by Xiaoschi View Post
i REALLY like the car
Ya. It's too bad it's had two different owners trying to ruin it! I've always loved R32 Skylines. But I don't think you can import them anymore and this one is in Canada so you couldn't bring it here even if you want it. They changed the import laws so cars now have to meet the US standards of the same year. Since R32's don't have driver airbags(which we had at the time) and the R34's don't have OBDII, the only Skylines you can import now are R33's. My brother-in-law's brother sold his R32 after the laws changed and made a killing.
Silverstone_Ryan is offline  
Old 01-18-2013, 08:35 AM
  #11  
THE STIG
Thread Starter
 
Switchblade's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NAZARETH, PA
Posts: 8,317
LOL, here's another one: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best...477732832.html


Enter the Wu - 94 Miata WuMissle

Ayo whattup the drift world is full of wishwash S13s nahmean. Imma jus get right to it:

94 Miata (dropped same year as 6 Feet Deep)
5spds, so you choose
springs cut with Shaolin steel
no muffler, so swarm
diff welded with words
new timing belt, water pump
recently blessed

I aint gonna front ***** real bouncy son, best part is it bangs but it aint dickridin nobody else style namsayin. But check it **** looks like Ish from WCC got the interior on. Runs like Tunechi when he see a dick swingin near. Drop $1800 gotta update the kitchen. May trade for a motherfuckin Ruckus.
  • Location: 36 chambers (Tampa, FL)
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests







Posting ID: 3477732832
Switchblade is offline  
Old 01-18-2013, 09:15 AM
  #12  
House of CR.
 
Vanishing Point's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Parker, Texas
Posts: 1,891
I don't know that this post is all that peculiar since most of the Miata people I've met talked this way. Zoom, zoom!
Vanishing Point is offline  
Old 01-18-2013, 09:40 AM
  #13  
Resident Curmudgeon
 
Java Junky's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Joisey
Posts: 999,652
VP . . da bagg'a dogg$hit set fire to in frunna'yer locker wuzzn't me.
(Gimme'couple'a minnittz . . he ain't done yet.)
Java Junky is offline  
Old 01-18-2013, 10:35 AM
  #14  
House of CR.
 
Vanishing Point's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Parker, Texas
Posts: 1,891
Aha, well wait till you see what's inside your locker. It likes to be scratched behind the ears, if you can find them.
Vanishing Point is offline  
Old 01-19-2013, 07:49 AM
  #15  
official newb
 
kreapin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: SFl
Posts: 771
^^^ ***** getting serious ^^^^




lol
kreapin is offline  
Old 01-19-2013, 12:49 PM
  #16  
8 Hours NE of the Dragon
 
kgf3076's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Here obviously.
Posts: 5,272
Originally Posted by Vanishing Point View Post
Aha, well wait till you see what's inside your locker. It likes to be scratched behind the ears, if you can find them.
You didn't put that 250 lb. short green thing with the really long tail and lots of teeth in there, did you?
kgf3076 is offline  
Old 01-21-2013, 05:58 AM
  #17  
THE STIG
Thread Starter
 
Switchblade's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NAZARETH, PA
Posts: 8,317
Originally Posted by kgf3076 View Post
You didn't put that 250 lb. short green thing with the really long tail and lots of teeth in there, did you?
No, he didn't......................... he put the blue one there!!
Switchblade is offline  
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
steevo04
New s2000.com Member Area / Introductions
14
11-13-2011 02:45 PM
RMurphy
Off-Topic
6
01-26-2010 02:30 PM
S2KCRick
Off-Topic
24
05-22-2009 11:35 PM
lonestarbuzz
Off-Topic
15
09-29-2008 01:21 PM
HELL_ON_WHEELS
Off-Topic
7
10-04-2007 07:57 PM


Thread Tools
Search this Thread
Quick Reply: Epic Craigslist add


Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service

© 2019 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.